I'm an adult...holy crap how did that happen?!

So, I'm preparing for a small dinner party tonight and it hit me while I was making a tiramisu that I have now totally and completely entered into adulthood...I know it didn't just happen overnight, but realizing it HAS happened has been a slow process.

Here are some of the signs that you have finally reached adulthood (in case you weren't sure yourself):

• You've found yourself making a tiramisu or any other kind of fru-fru dessert. No, rice-krispie treats do not count (though they are equally delicious).
• You look at your bank account and there is actually enough money to pay all your bills.
• You can't remember the last time you bounced a check.
• You have 'effin dinner parties!
• You use matching china at those dinner parties.
• You go to the dentist/gyno/eye doctor on a regular basis.
• You start saying things like,"Those darn kids are making too much racket."
• You finally appreciate what your parents had to go through to raise you not to be a serial killer or stripper.
• You start thinking about having kids, like, SERIOUSLY thinking about it. (I'm not sure all men go through this step.)
• You drive more cautiously. When I say cautiously, I mean no more than 5 miles over the speed limit, signal your turns, don't tailgate, etc. (My husband would say I have not achieved this bullet yet.)
• You own every kitchen gadget known to man.
• You go to bed by 11 pm and wake up by 7 am (sometimes on the weekends, too!).
• You read for pleasure. (Currently reading Harry Potter #7 for the third time.)
• You are gainfully employed.
• You use words like "utilize" and "garner."
• Your mother actually goes out on a limb and tells you you're finally acting like an adult.

Umm, I'm sure there are more and will be more as I keep getting more "adult-like." Please comment and share your "signs that you've reached adulthood!"

Oh, and in case you feel like crossing off the "making a tiramisu" bullet off your adulthood list, here is the recipe!

Tiramisu
From "The Gourmet Cookbook"
Serves 6

3 large eggs, separated
3/4 cup sugar
1 (8 ounce) container (scant 1 cup) of marscapone
Pinch of salt
1/2 cup of very cold heavy cream
2 cups brewed espresso or very strong coffee, cooled to room temperature
2 tablespoons sweet Marsala wine
18 savoiardi (crisp Italian ladyfingers)
1/4 cup good bittersweet chocolate shavings (not unsweetened; shavings made with a vegetable peeler) or 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

Beat together yolks and 1/2 cup sugar in a large bowl with an electric mixer at medium speed until thick and pale, about 2 minutes. Beat in marscapone until just combined.

Beat whites and salt in another bowl with cleaned beaters until whites hold soft peaks. Add remaining 1/4 cup sugar a little at a time, beating, then continue to beat until whites just hold stiff peaks.

Beat cream in another bowl with cleaned beaters until it just holds soft peaks. Gently but thoroughly fold cream into marscapone mixture, then fold in whites.

Stir together espresso and Marsala in a shallow bowl. Dip 1 ladyfinger in the espresso mixture, soaking it for about 4 seconds on each side, and transfer to an 8-inch square baking dish (1 quart capacity). Repeat with 8 more ladyfingers, trimming them as needed to fit snugly in bottom of dish. Spread half of marscapone mixture evenly over ladyfingers. Make another layer in the same manner with remaining ladyfingers and marscapone mixture. Refrigerate tiramisu, covered, for at least 6 hours.

Just before serving, sprinkle with chocolate.

One note, I needed many more ladyfingers to cover the bottom of my dish, so buy extra just in case. Also, I ended up brewing strong coffee instead of espresso, which is fine. Also, make sure you buy SWEET Marsala wine, not the stuff you find for cooking. Lastly, any kind of ladyfingers will do, but we really liked the flavor of the Italian ladyfingers or savoiardi. They are bigger and soak up the coffee or espresso better than others you might find.

YUM!

The kiddies have taken over

Chapel Hill is alive again and positively throbbing with energy from the thousands of college students and their families who have made their way to campus. School doesn't actually start until Wednesday, so these kids have two whole days of mischief ahead of them.

I honestly MISS being in college and am a little jealous of these kids. Their worlds are so wide open and full of potential and possibilities. Okay, in all fairness, my world is still wide-open and full of possibilities, but there is something to that feeling of utter naivete and unabashed optimism that greets you with every new school year.

Heck, I even miss the school work. Um, is it weird to admit that I MISS being graded? I MISS sitting in class and having the knowledge of my professors wash over me (some were more successful at communicating that knowledge than others). I miss that feeling of being part of a system larger than myself. Of being affiliated with a university...MY university.

My three and a half years in college were like a dream. I dated; I went to school; I went to parties; I had sisters; I went to football games; I ate...A LOT. I never really had to think about the outside world. That is, of course, with the very big exception of 9/11, which happened during my sophomore year.

I am in the real world now, but still living on a college campus. It's a very surreal feeling. It's like straddling two worlds. On the one hand, I get to experience the energy associated with a college campus (youth, college sports, under-age shenanigans, etc.) and on the other, I'm married, contemplating having kids in the near future, looking for a job, paying bills, making ends meet...you get the picture.

Sometimes, I really do just have to stop and thank my lucky, quirky, unpredictable stars for my life.

Oh yeah, GO SEMINOLES!!

Baby, it's hot outside

Yes, boys and girls, we are in the dead of summer and it is proving to be a H-O-T one. I honestly don't mind the heat. I'm one of the few people who prefer warm weather to cold.

This hot weather actually reminds me of the extreme heat and humidity we experienced during our wedding festivities over two years ago (Oh my god. Has been TWO years already?!)

Let me set the scene: July 2007. British Virgin Islands. Tortola, to be exact. Beautiful aquamarine water with sugar white sand beaches and searing 90+ degree heat. I'm walking down the aisle, sweating after only 30 seconds outside and I see my wonderful husband-to-be absolutely DRENCHED in sweat (of course, he had to wear a khaki suit). I'm sunburned, he's sunburned. I'm an emotional wreck. My Dad is sobbing. My Mom is sobbing. The photographer had been yelling at me right before I went to walk down the aisle that if I don't hurry up the officiant will leave. So I'm pretty emotionally fragile and pissed off that I was running late and that the freakin' photographer was telling ME what to do on my own wedding day.

Despite all that, it was still one of the most profound, life changing 15 minutes of my life. Oh yeah, and the food wasn't bad either.

Luckily, and despite me wishing ill on the photographer, the pictures from our special day came out wonderfully. I've included a few here. Enjoy!

This week so far...

Well, this week has been a strange one so far. Not bad by any means, but not great. I'm still in limbo-city about whether they are offering me the job or not. It won't be until late next week that I find out. I looove working from home, but I definitely could use the money and the human interaction that this job would surely provide. So, there's that. Then our air conditioning has been acting wonky this week making the apartment feel like a wet refrigerator. NOT a good combination.

Finally, my friend Shana and I have been going to the gym a lot lately. Which is great, BUT I am getting all achy and creaky feeling in odd places. I'm only 27 for god's sake!! (Well, to be fair, I WILL be turning 28 in less than a month...crikey!).

Our goal this week is to go to every class, Monday through Friday. So, Step was Monday, Sculpt was yesterday, Yoga is today, Zumba is tomorrow and Kickboxing is Friday. I am quite possibly the least coordinated person in the entire class (with the exception of the men who join us...poor guys).

I made the Apple Raisin cake on Saturday and it turned out to be so good. The cake had the right amount of cinnamon, raisins, apples - perfect for the fall! My husband thinks I'm trying to fatten him up by baking all the time, so I sliced up the cake and gave it to his little starving college students. They loved it, or at least pretended to love it, which is fine by me.

Apple Raisin Cake:













So, it's not a bad week, it's just not a great week...yet. Tonight we're having dinner with my sorority sister which will be fun. And Saturday I have my first Junior League meeting at the "Hill House"...should be interesting!!

Being happy

I will not pretend to be an expert at what makes people happy, but I am slowly beginning to learn what makes ME happy...It's only taken 27 years to do so! Just read about this new study from UNC that basically says that they key to happiness is to focus on the small, everyday things that make you happy.

For instance, waking up in the morning and having the change to share a morning cup of coffee with my husband makes me insanely happy. Going to the gym makes me happy. The sound of my mother's voice makes me really happy (except when she's lecturing me on my shopping habit ;-). Having time to lay on the couch and read for an uninteruppeted period of time makes me happy. Snuggling up with my husband to watch tv before bed makes me happy. Being outside makes me happy...especially during the periods between winter and spring and between summer and fall when the weather is perfect.

From The Chapel Hill News
UNC study: To build resilience, don't worry, see happyPatric Lane, UNC News Services
CHAPEL HILL - People who seed their life with frequent moments of positive emotions increase their resilience against challenges, according to a new study by a UNC psychologist and colleagues. The study, "Happiness Unpacked: Positive Emotions Increase Life Satisfaction by Building Resilience," appears in the June issue of the bimonthly journal Emotion.

"This study shows that if happiness is something you want out of life, then focusing daily on the small moments and cultivating positive emotions is the way to go," said Barbara Fredrickson, Ph.D., Kenan Distinguished Professor of Psychology in UNC's College of Arts and Sciences and the principal investigator of the Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology Laboratory.

"Those small moments let positive emotions blossom, and that helps us become more open. That openness then helps us build resources that can help us rebound better from adversity and stress, ward off depression and continue to grow."

In the monthlong study, 86 participants were asked to submit daily "emotion reports," rather than answering general questions like, "Over the last few months, how much joy did you feel?"

"Getting those daily reports helped us gather more accurate recollections of feelings and allowed us to capture emotional ups and downs," said Fredrickson, a leading expert in the field of positive psychology. Building up a daily diet of positive emotions does not require banishing negative emotions, she said. The study helps show that to be happy, people do not need to adopt a "Pollyannaish" approach and deny the upsetting aspects of life.

"The levels of positive emotions that produced good benefits weren't extreme. Participants with average and stable levels of positive emotions still showed growth in resilience even when their days included negative emotions."

What little things make you happy?

What's cookin'?

Or baking I should say...I feel like baking a cake today. I meant to do it last night, but I was out of eggs...and I went over to my friend Shana's house and had waaaay too much good wine.

Anyway, I thought I would share the recipe of my latest kitchen experiment: Apple Raisin Cake, courtesy of The Gourmet Cookbook (2004).

Apple Raisin Cake

Ingredients
3 cups all purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 cups vegetable oil
3 large eggs
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
1/2 cup packed light brown sugar
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1 tablespoon dark rum
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 Golden Delicious apples (peeled, cored, and cut into 1/4 inch dice)
1/2 cup raisins

Instructions
Put a rack in the middle of the oven and preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter and flour Bundt pan, knocking out extra flour.

Sift together flour, baking soda and salt into a bowl.

Whisk together oil, eggs, sugars, cinnamon, nutmeg, rum and vanilla in a large bowl until just combined. Fold in flour mixture until just combined, then fold in apples and raisins.

Spoon batter into pan. Bake until a wooden pick or skewer inserted in center of cake comes out clean, about 1 1/4 hours. Cool cake pan on a rack for 10 minutes, then turn out onto rack to cool completely.

Happy Friday!!

Today is a great day...

Today is a great day because...

...I'm eating a peanut butter & jelly sandwich, with homemade peanut butter and raspberry jam (which I guess makes it a peanut butter & jam sandwich)...

...I just got back from a yoga class and now I feel all loosey goosey...

...They are checking my references and I am in the final three. Glad to have made it this far...

...Even if I don't get the job I can be satisfied in knowing that I'm still employed and I love what I do...

...My husband is planning a themed opening for the residence hall we live in. The theme: "Hogwarts." Love that man!

...It's a little cloudy today, which has cooled off the entire city. Finally!...

...And finally, today is a great day because I have family and friends who love me just as I love them. And they should know that though I may not talk to them every day, week, month (heck, or even every year) I do and always will love them...

Sincerely just seems so insincere

Sorry if it seems like I've been taking the easy way out lately by re-posting articles I've ready, but hey, I'm a pr professional, it's what I do...

I just read a witty article on e-mail sign-offs in the Miami Herald. Enjoy!

Posted on Mon, Aug. 10, 2009
Sincerely just seems so insincere
BY RUTH McCANN Washington Post Service

It feels like the 18th century all over again. All that daily correspondence, all those long hours spent hunched over a desk, composing some thoughtful missive about one's dowry or the Jacobite rebellions. Signed, ``Yr humble servant.''

Same deal now, basically, except we're not clutching quills; we're writing a passel of e-mails and clicking send on ye olde BlackBerry. And something else isn't quite the same: Unlike the heroes and heroines of epistolary novels, we aren't blessed with time-tested formal guidance on the correct way to sign off.
``Best''?
``Cheers''?
``Sincerely''?

For Daniel Morrison, CEO of the international relief nonprofit 1Well, the wrong sign-off posed an impediment to deeper romance.

``I sent an e-mail to a girlfriend, and she was very put off by me signing off with `Regards,' saying that I sounded very `emotionally detached,' '' Morrison says via e-mail. ``We did break up shortly thereafter, so maybe she was right.''

Will Schwalbe, co-author with David Shipley of Send: Why People Email So Badly and How to Do It Better, warns, ``You can really do a lot of damage, even with a careless closing. And one of the terrifying things about e-mail is: You may never know.'' But you may well feel the chill.

``If you have been writing to someone `Best' this and `Best' that, and you get an e-mail that is a little colder, a little hostile, and they sign `Sincerely,' that does mean things aren't so good,'' Schwalbe says. `` `Sincerely' is the one that says, `There's a problem here.' ''

And, one may well wonder, does ``Cordially'' ever mean anything other than ``My hostility is only thinly veiled''?

IS `BEST' BEST?

Craig Brownstein, vice president of media relations at the PR firm Edelman, is a devotee of ``Best'' and its variants. He says he started seeing ``Best'' in e-mails a few years ago and has since picked it up. But that professional close can quickly escalate into greater e-intimacies.
Brownstein asked his research team, StrategyOne, to catalog the most common e-mail closing lines with an online poll. (The sample of about a thousand Internet users came from a nonrandom pool of respondents, so these numbers are rather more food for thought than hard data.)

``Best,'' as it happens, was barely a blip on this survey's radar. Twenty-five percent of participants said they close their professional e-mails with ``Sincerely,'' while 20 percent use some variant of ``Thank you,'' and 17 percent use no closing at all. ``Love'' is the most common personal e-mail closing, followed by no closing.

This all might come as no great surprise to Peter Post, author of Essential Manners for Men, and one of manner maven Emily Post's great-grandchildren. Post swears by ``Sincerely,'' which he describes as an all-purpose, ``safe'' e-mail close -- the little black dress of sign-offs, if you will. ``Yours truly'' and ``Regards'' can also work, Post says.

In their book, Schwalbe and Shipley recommend ``Best'' and ``Best wishes'' as ``among the most common in e-mail -- safe, all-purpose ways of bringing a note to an end.''

Schwalbe himself often ratchets ``Best'' up to ``Best!'' -- with the exclamation point added to warm up a medium in which everything can unfortunately sound a wee bit frigid and humorless.
Huffington Post editor-in-chief Arianna Huffington, likewise, says that one can do better than ``Sincerely.''

``The problem with traditional sign-offs like `Sincerely' is not so much that they're too cold as that they're like vestiges of another medium: letters,'' Huffington says. ``I've always used `Best' or `All the best,' because that's always been standard for me, even for letters. And I never liked `Sincerely' -- I always found it very cold.''

FOR MARINES, IT'S `S/F'
Murky waters unless you're in the military, where specific closings are standard. Matthew Cox, a senior staff writer at The Army Times, says that members of the Navy and the Air Force often close their e-mails with ``V/R'' (``Very respectfully''). For the Marines, it's ``S/F'' (Semper Fi), while Army Rangers sign off with ``RLTW'' (``Rangers Lead the Way'').

Participants in the StrategyOne survey reported all manner of e-mail closings that tumble forth from correspondents reveling in the intoxicating mania of near-instantaneous communication. Among them: ``In brotherhood,'' ``That's me yo,'' ``Hope you live through the night,'' ``Safety first,'' ``Wonka wonka'' and ``Seacrest out.''

Until e-mail etiquette starts being taught in elementary school, perhaps we've little choice left but to hit send first and ask forgiveness later.

I know this article advocates "Best" as the sign-off of choice, but I think it's more impersonal than "sincerely." What does it even mean?? Uggh...I cringe anytime someone sends me an e-mail using it. I truly WOULD prefer "Seacrest out"... at least it's original!

My top sign-offs:

Professional:

• Thanks
• Thank you
• Sincerely
• Have a great day
• Thanks in advance

Personal:

• Love you
• Love
• Kxxx
• LYMTML (that's "Love you more than my luggage" - sent only to my mother. If you've ever watched "Steel Magnolias" you'd understand)

I'll have to take "Wonka Wonka" for a spin...Or perhaps "Biance out"...

Wonka Wonka,

Kristen

Health care debate

I was just running in Chapel Hill (which, by the way, feels more like Dante's Inferno at 99 degrees this afternoon) and listening to NPR and I heard an opinion piece on the national health care debate that I found to be pretty spot-on.

The Health Care Debate Is Making Me Sick
by Brian Unger, National Public Radio

The health care debate is toxic, revealing a lot about us as a nation. And it feels embarrassing — like the whole world can see our underpants. Or hear us fighting in the kitchen.

First, most of us can't describe accurately the details of the health care reform now under debate. That makes us look stupid or too busy to care.

Second, most of us can't describe accurately the health care or insurance we currently have, so that makes us look kind of stupid, too, or lazy.

Some of us don't care about people who don't have health insurance, so that makes us seem unsympathetic or super lucky.

Most of us don't understand that we're already paying for people who don't have health care — which makes us too busy to care, in denial or merely rich.

Some of us — a lot of us — already receive health care under some form of government plan, but don't believe in health care under some form of government plan. That makes us hypocritical or selfish. In some camps, I hear that makes us patriotic.

A lot of us are a combination of these things: too busy, lazy, a bit stupid perhaps, lucky, unsympathetic, in-denial, really rich, hypocritical, selfish ... and patriotic.

We're having an identity crisis when it comes to caring about the nation's health, which makes me think what we really need is psychotherapy. But, sadly, that's not covered under most health plans, if you have one at all

To many, health care reform is scary, like someone's building a halfway house for criminals right at their doorstep. It's a N.I.M.B.Y. ("Not In My Backyard") issue evolved into a N.O.M.B.O. ("Not On My Back, Obama") issue.

People never change. But policy can, so our health care reformers must get more creative and visionary.
How about a Cash for Clunkers Program? Not for cars, but for older, beat-up people whose bodies have wear and tear, and can't go long distances when they're filled with gas?

Our government is offering us $4,500 to buy a new car. Can it also offer humans incentives — say, a tax break — to join a gym? To quit smoking? Or to buy produce from local farmers? Reward schools that teach kids how to eat right and exercise? You know, kind of like that class we used to offer kids called "gym."

Let's pay people to stay healthy, instead of only paying for them when they get sick. Then maybe our nation will find its compassion, the one true antidote for its health care identity crisis.

Now, I won't try to proselytize anyone with this blog, but I do believe our national health care system is broken and something needs to be done. I also won't pretend to be an expert in health care reform, but we cannot sit idly by and let certain individuals hi-jack the discussion through outright scare tactics and bullying.

The kids discussion

Since my husband and I got married we've occasionally talked about having kids and the conversation is usually the same:

Me: "I want kids."

Him: "Not now."

Me: "Well, now is the perfect time...We have no expenses...I have a great job."

Him: "I'm in graduate school, making $10k a year. Talk to me when we BOTH have fulltime jobs."

Me: deep sigh...

Well, here is the quote of the day from my lovely husband after having another such conversation:

"Kids: they're like teddy bears that cost a lot of money."

I love my husband and do appreciate his side of the argument. Having kids does cost money and is (or so I've heard from everyone who has one) a lot of work. He is very rational and I am very irrational when it comes to this discussion...I wish it wasn't that way, but there it is.

Stay tuned...

Tribute to John Hughes

I was just a little kid in the 80's, so it wasn't until my teenage years that I discovered the delightfully teenage angst/lust ridden movies of John Hughes.

My favorites include: The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Pretty in Pink...The list goes on...

He even wrote Home Alone and Home Alone 2 - two of our favorite Christmas-time movies.

Though they were set in the awkward, wonderful 80's, his film's themes were universal and are rarely replicated with success these days...with some notable exceptions, of course.

Here is a tribute to John Hughes from the St. Petersburg Time's "Stuck in the 80's" blogger, Steve Spears:

August 07, 2009
The lesson of John Hughes: 'Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.'

The man who guided us through awkward school dances, soul-crushing romances — and the best hooky day ever — died Thursday in New York, far from Chicago, the city he loved.

I miss John Hughes a lot. And like many people who grew up during the ’80s, I feel less than whole today, like I lost a parent — or at least a wise, and wise-cracking, Uncle Buck.

Through his movies, we learned it was okay to feel (and show) pain, to wrestle with uncertainty, to express love. We learned to be human. And, at the very least, we learned all the words to Danke Schoen.

After Sixteen Candles, it was suddenly okay to rule the geek nation like Farmer Ted, to suffer a silent crush with dignity like Samantha Baker. After The Breakfast Club, trading swagger for sensitivity a la John Bender was in vogue on locker row.

Every movie Hughes wrote or directed was a mirror image of our own pimply, awkward lives. Were you Gary or Wyatt from Weird Science? Or maybe Duckie Dale from Pretty in Pink? Maybe you leaned toward Amanda Jones from Some Kind of Wonderful. And doesn’t everyone wish that we could be just like Ferris Bueller -- if only for one day off.

Hughes left Hollywood behind in the mid ’90s without giving fans a reason. Maybe he’d given all he had and felt there was nothing more to say. Maybe like Steve Martin’s character in Planes Trains & Automobiles, he discovered the place he loved most was home with his family.

Or maybe, like any proud parent, he realized his audience had grown up and was ready to tackle the world on their own.

And now that parent is gone. But I thank him. And I’ll miss him. So go ahead and cry if you want to. Or put on your Ferris Bueller DVD and laugh until you can’t breathe. Life moves pretty fast, if you don’t stop and look around ... well, you know the rest.
Posted by Steve Spears at 12:55:10 AM on August 7, 2009

Here's to you, John Hughes. May you rest in peace.

Fun Web site of the day

www.EmailYourInterviewer.com

Okay, maybe not so fun if you have to actually use it.

It's no secret that I have been searching for a new job for quite some time up here in North Carolina. Sometime during my resume/cover letter writing process I came across the blog "Ask a Manager" and became hooked. The writer is the hiring manager for a non-profit and pretty much an HR guru. She is extremely funny and her answers to people's hiring/firing/hr questions are spot on.

Anywho, people send her their interview experience horror stories and she posts them for everyone to read and learn from. A couple of posts ago she came up with the idea for creating a form letter to send anonymously to interviewers who leave you hanging or are extremely rude.

Luckily, the people I am interviewing with are wonderful and very responsive, but if you have the need, check out www.emailyourinterviewer.com. Use responsibly!

Today is a great day...

Today is a great day because:

...My legs hurt from Sculpt class yesterday. But, they hurt in a good way. Like you know you've worked your muscles pretty good, and they're saying "thank you! We needed that!"

...I just got back from a second interview with a company I really love and I think I did pretty darn well. And, if they don't hire me, that's okay because I know I did the best I possibly could.

...I'm married to one of the kindest, smartest, funniest, hardest working men I know.

...As I write, I'm munching on one of my recent experiements in the kitchen involving Splenda, flour, homemade peanut butter, chocoloate and butterscotch and it doesn't taste half bad.

...I'm going to a restaurant I've never been to for friend's birthday tonight.

Lastly...Today is a great day, because I've discovered blogging and realize how much pleasure I get writing and organizing my thoughts this way. And because there are so many people like me out there doing the same thing.

Sculpt class

Just got back from my first experience attending a "Sculpt" class at the UNC gym. All I can say is "damn, I hurt." I considered myself to be in pretty good shape, though, I will admit to having slacked off the gym time since summer school ended. I met my friend Shana there who is new to Chapel Hill like me.

We were a huffin' and a puffin' through that class which started with squats and pretty much ended with squats (which are my mortal enemy now). But in the end I feel pretty darn good, if not just a teeny weeny bit wobbly on my legs.

Anywho, I have been experiencing some pretty frustrating technical difficulties this morning with my computer. Now, I'm off to go scout out a free WIFI hotspot that will allow me to get some work done.

Have a wonderful Tuesday...